My Rocky Mountain Heart

We have had a lot of good fortune lately, a lot of things lining up to help us more easily transition to the next chapter of our lives. Honestly, it’s been hard to believe the number of blessings that have occurred one after the other. And without knowing more about the situation, it might seem that we are just very lucky.  In fact, I recently got a message from a friend that said, “I need a little bit of the magic that the universe is throwing your way! Congratulations!” And this message got me thinking about that magic – what have I done to deserve this? What have I been doing differently? Have I done anything to deserve these blessings?

The thing is, I’ve always had a problem with the idea of luck. Because if luck is the driving force behind the blessings we do or don’t receive, then it means that we have no part in creating our reality, our future, and our legacy. Our lives are then merely a reaction or response to the external circumstances that are ultimately dictating it. However, I’ve recently come to learn that this is simply not true. I believe that external circumstances are actually a response to or a manifestation of our internal state. That sounds nice and all but what does that really mean?

Well, over the last year and a half, I’ve devoted countless hours to reading personal development books, writing down goals, having conversations with my husband about our vision for our life. I’ve spent even more hours contemplating the steps I need to take to grow as a person, to reach my goals, and to figure out what is most important to me. And if you know anything about Tony Robbins (self-help and motivational guru), then you know that he didn’t become who he is now overnight — he spent YEARS developing and harnessing his power and then he started sharing it with the world.

I believe that each and every one of us inherently has power and talent that we have not yet discovered or tapped into. Why have we not discovered it? Why haven’t we tapped into our power? Because we live in fear. We choose fear. But then you ask me, why would we choose fear if we are capable of so much more? Well, lots of reasons.

•Fear of failure

•Fear of success

•Fear of what others will think

•Fear of not “fitting in”

•Fear of the unknown

•Fear of being “different”

•Fear of unfulfillment

•Fear of __________

You get the idea….

When we get honest with ourselves about why we haven’t gone for it – then we can grow past the fear. So let me tell you a little bit about getting honest with myself and acknowledging my fear.

I’ve always wanted to move to the mountains and live in a ski town, ever since I was 3 years old and learned to ski. I don’t know why, I just do. I feel alive and free in the mountains and that’s just where my heart yearns to be. But I’ve also always been afraid to move there. Why am I afraid? Well…

+What if it’s not actually as magical as it is in my mind?

+What if we can’t afford the kind of place we want and are accustomed to living in?

+What if I get sick of the tourists and end up feeling resentful, annoyed and stuck?

+What if we can’t make ends meet because the cost of living is so high?

+What will everyone think of us if we choose a “ski bum” life over parenthood (which is clearly expected of us after 9 years married!)?

+What if there aren’t people our age who we like and want to become good friends with?

So…you see a running theme here?

Fear.

But when I get REALLY honest — I know that none of these fears are true.  These fears are just evidence of me disconnecting from my truth, my power, and my legacy.  When I stay connected to what I know in my core to be true – that this decision is the right decision, I am at peace and I am happy.  All the details of the next chapter will be revealed to me in time, but I have to be willing to let life unfold. I have to stop trying to “push the river” as my Dad has often said to me. (I love that image…pushing a river…it’s crazy, isn’t it?)

Lately, I have become a huge fan of Audible and listening to these personal development books when you are stuck in awful traffic could maybe be a testament to the power that they can give you in your life.  Most recently I started listening to Gabrielle Bernstein’s “Spirit Junkie.”  In Chapter 1, Gabby refers to a “Course in Miracles” by Dr. Helen Schucman and she says, “The course teaches that each time we shift our perception from fear to love, we create a miracle. The more miracles you add up, the more extraordinary your life will be. The outside world and all your relationships will be enhanced as a result of your inner shift. Serenity will kick in, fear will subside, and once and for all, you’ll know that all the love you need is inside you.”

Perhaps this quote doesn’t mean much to you without the context of the book, but I promise if you let these words marinade and you think on them, it will rock your world.  For me, this quote embodies what has happened in my life as of late.  I have shifted my perception and thoughts from fear to love.  It is important to note that Gabby defines love as “the right-minded emotion of peace and joy” – it has nothing to do with romantic love with typically associate with the word ‘love.’ So when I say that lately what has been different in my life, is that I am choosing love over fear, I hope you understand that this means I am choosing peace and joy and I am letting go of my fearful thoughts.

So I guess what I am saying is this: I don’t think it’s luck or magic.  I think we are choosing to live in alignment with the energy of the universe.  We are open, honest, and living in love.  That is where the magic is – choosing love, choosing to stand in your power, and choosing your legacy – DESPITE the fear.

Tonight I will leave you with this quote from Marianne Williamson and I encourage each of you to get honest with yourself about what is blocking you in  your life, to acknowledge  your fear, and ultimately to choose peace and joy over fear and doubt.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”